The Only Way Out

For thousands of years, education has been one of the most critical aspects of Chinese culture. The Imperial examination system weakened the importance of classes and allowed anyone, no matter class or family background, to be able to work in the government if scoring high enough on the exam. In 1927, the communist leader Mao Zedong rose from the bottom, defeated the already exhausted nationalist Kuomintang, and liberated mainland China at the end of the year 1949. At the end of Mao’s reign, the cultural revolution broke out. The revolution aims to destroy traditional Chinese elements, also known as the “Four Olds.” Including arts, Confucius beliefs, and the traditional Chinese family structures. Most importantly, millions of intellectuals were targeted for being “enemies of the working class”. Those who were targeted were put into denunciation rallies where they would be publicly humiliated, accused, beaten, and tortured. Millions of scientists, artists, and intellectuals were killed or forced to commit suicide. Being the supreme leader of new China, Mao attracted millions of followers and encouraged them to accomplish goals such as seizing power and destroying symbols of China’s pre-communist past. These followers were given the name of red guards, and they were the hands and feet of the man behind the curtain. For ten long years, it was catastrophic for Chinese intellectuals, as the color red shrouded the vast land of the newly liberated China. My great-grandfather, being an educated college president, was one of the main targets during the revolution. When the red guards came to his house to arrest him, my great grandma helped him hide in the ceilings and avoided being put into the denunciation rallies and sent to work in the fields if still capable. The Gao Kao, or college entrance exam developed from the imperial examination system was forced to pause for ten-years spam and millions of students who had worked extremely hard their entire life just for this one moment hoping to use education to get a brighter future were left in the dust and became the lost generation of modern China. Luckily for my grandfather, he was already in college when the exam was forced to pause. Being the son of a targeted intellectual whose life was in great danger, my grandfather still decided to finish college knowing the importance of higher education, an action that was extremely rare in his generation as most of his peers could not even read or write.
Being a third-generation college student myself, my family values education. However, unlike a lot of traditional Chinese parents that believe the Gao Kao is the only way out, my family believes that education is not just sitting in a classroom and listening to teachers lecture since unlike my grandfather, I don’t need to rely on the Gao Kao to change my class or my socio-economic status. To my family, education is more about gaining experience and looking at and exploring the world from different perspectives. I was extremely lucky to be able to travel to more than a dozen countries with my family before turning 15 and being able to travel the world with my family was truly eye-opening, and I learned more from traveling than sitting in any lecture halls or classrooms. At an early stage, my family shapes my views on education. Later, alongside the views on education of my family, the Chinese education system would also help shape my views on education, and to allow me to think about what I want, and where I truly belong.
Growing up I was always curious; I loved to ask questions and explore the world. In kindergarten and elementary school, I vividly remember being encouraged to ask questions and challenge authority, but as time passes, things are gradually changing. The entire goal of the Chinese education system nowadays is to prepare students for the Gao Kao, or college entrance exam. This exam is offered once a year and has the power to decide one’s entire future. Students who have lower socioeconomic status depend on this exam hoping it could get them out of the remote mountains and rewrite their future since this might be their only way out. Being the most important event for a lot of students, there is absolutely no room for free thinking. All students must do is follow what the teacher says and study hard. By the time I was in middle school, besides the intense curriculum that the teachers had to cover to prepare us for the exam, communist ideas were also taught, with it being part of the new curriculum, we were also made to memorize propaganda that we didn’t even understand. Obeying what the teachers and the class representatives say was one of the central ideas of my middle school. I was once forced to publicly apologize to one of the class representatives for not obeying her, and when I asked the teacher why I had to do that, she simply stated that it was the rule. At my school, one must unconditionally obey what the class representatives say since they represent the teachers, ironically, not the students. All these experiences made education boring for me. Just like how American writer Bell Hooks felt like the classroom was like a prison for her as mentioned in her book Teaching to Transgress, I felt the same way. Learning was boring and dreadful, and I was constantly getting in trouble for being too “free and loose.” Over time, I started to realize that this form of education was not at all what I want, and not what my family wanted either. The education I and my family wanted is not about sitting in a classroom and preparing for tests, and I did not need the Gao Kao to change my future, I wanted to write my own future.
Although the Chinese education system was not the best fit for me, I must give thanks to it as it allowed me to figure out what works for me and what does not, and to think about what I want. With education being valued for generations in my family, I was sent to the United States for school and to eventually pursue higher education, and this decision made by me and my family with the help of the Chinese education system is the best decision I have ever made as I found my way out.

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