Dating and Devaluation

Step it up

You might have gotten together with a partner that charmed you during the first part of your relationship. He or she might have gotten you flowers every day, and he or she might have always been up to text you when you woke up. The dates that the two of you had, in the beginning, might have been great, and the two of you might have really gotten along. However, when the two of you finally decided to get into a relationship, all of this might have stopped. Things might have started to get monotonous, and the flowers and fun dates might have begun to disappear. So, what do you do in this case? How do you approach this situation? Though the answers to these questions might be different for everyone, here are a few suggestions.

1. Discuss the change with your partner.

Talk to your partner about your observations and ask him or her if he or she has noticed the changes in your relationship as well. If he or she says that he or she has, then ask him or her why the changes occurred. Try to talk about how you feel the beginning of your relationship went and why the things that you did, in the beginning, were important to you.

2. Set your expectations.

Let the other person know how you want things to go, and ask him or her what his or her expectations are. If you want to have a date night every week or appreciate getting flowers once in a while, tell your partner, and see how he or she feels about this. Ask him or her what he or she wants from the relationship as well, and discuss both of your needs.

3. Make a change.

Compromise on how the two of you can rekindle your romance. Talk about the things that you need to do in order to do this. Schedule dates if that is something that both of you want to incorporate into your routine. Talk about things that you can do for one another on a regular basis and do your best to set your plans into action.

If your relationship has changed since you and your partner have gotten together then try to talk to each other about this change. Decide what the two of you need to do in order to get things back on course, and do your best to put these plans into motion.

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